An infestation of communist shirkers and Muslim anti-colonialists, Hillary’s Coalition of the Ascendant, sailed into the Port of Washington yesterday led by the Dragon Lady herself. Jumping into Hill’s Scooby Van they found their path blocked by the fearless Mitch McConnell and his Coalition of the Dependents, named after the undergarments so many of them wear.
“Behold, Cracker Barrel’s brunch special is almost over,” Hilla the Hun pointed, and in the confusion unveiled her 10 demandments, “I’m unveiling my 10 demandments. Actually five, but I wrote them down twice.”
1.Thou shall not stand your ground and kill Muslims rioting outside your Libyan embassy. Thou shall instead, stand down.
2.Thou shall not commit adultery with anyone named Monica ever again!
3.Thou shall remember Ronald Reagan’s birthday day, to keep it holy. NOT!
4.Thou shall always take the names Ronald and Reagan in vain
5.Thou shall have chips implanted to track thy e-mails and store them on a private server that only Hillary’s staff has access to.
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